i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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