Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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