I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
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