I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
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