Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
