okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
