party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
