from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
