How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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