were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
