Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
