3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
