maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
