its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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