Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I looked at my own cervix.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
