Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
