didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
