He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
