I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
