and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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