i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
