from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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