I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
