This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
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