so let's talk penis.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
ok first of all what the fuck
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
