The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
