rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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