I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
