Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
