if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
