I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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