You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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