If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
