You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
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