I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Randomize
