when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Randomize
