I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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