Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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