omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
