Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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