belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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