i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
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