so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
