Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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