they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
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