I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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