i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
