I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
