Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
How does it feel to date your dad?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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