What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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